Author Topic: Sentient Razor Water  (Read 2706 times)

Mr. C4

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Sentient Razor Water
« on: April 15, 2016, 10:11:26 PM »
This is a racial track for a game my friends and I are starting.  I just kinda threw it together so any input would be appreciated as all of the 'balance' is incredibly haphazard.  The idea is to have a playable swarm of sorts.

From the depths rise droplets of water just a little bit sharper than the rest. Linked together by their hivemind and confusion at everyone else's fascination with land, they hope to show everyone the benefits and beauty of the submerged life, even if they have to do it by force.

HP: 10/level                              Skills: 5

1st Circle - Cutting EdgeEx: Moving out of a square of difficult terrain doesn't cost you extra movement. At will, you may cast the world-mind spell. In addition you gain access to the following natural weapon:
  • Razor Water - Melee, range [Close], [Thrown], [Traumatizing], [Swarm](using half level for damage)
2nd Circle - The Cool FlowEx: For one [Round] as a swift action, the next time a creature is damaged by an attack action or ability that activates The Cool Flow you deal additional damage with the [Cold] descriptor equal to your KOM. At 15th level, this damage is applied any time a creature is damaged with an attack action or ability that activates The Cool Flow & inflicts the [Bleeding] condition.

3rd Circle - Crushing WaveEx: Once per [Encounter], plus an additional usage for every 4 character levels you have, as a move action, you may create a wedge originating from you out to a distance of half your movement speed.  Choose a number of squares equal to half your level within that wedge, create a Puddle marker in each square. These Puddle markers last for a number of [Rounds] equal to the number of circles you have in this track.  Creatures who begin their turn on a Puddle marker take your KOM in damage. You may choose an unoccupied square within that wedge and you [Teleport] there. This ability can activate The Cool Flow on each creature who takes damage.

4th Circle - Deep WalkerEx: You gain [Tremorsense] out to [Close] range, [Immunity] to [Cold] damage, and you gain the [Diving] movement mode & can ascend or descend in 5 [Rounds].

The [Diving] movement mode works exactly like [Soaring], but for the deep sea.  In addition, we've homebrewed the Elemental Reactor & Neutronium Reactor to be a choice between the two on acquisition. Our undead come from the depths as well, so this movement mode will likely be used more than once should the party invest.

5th Circle - Piercing VeilEx: As a standard action, you become a cloud as per the solid fog spell with a [Melee] range equal to your cloud. Any creature entering the cloud or ending their turn in the cloud takes your KOM in physical or [Cold] damage, chosen each time a creature would take damage. You have line of sight and line of effect to all creatures within your cloud. If any square within the cloud is targeted for an attack or ability treat yourself as a target as well, you can only be targeted once per ability including AOE abilities. You can only move with 5-foot steps while in cloud form, but may take other actions as normal. As a standard action, choose an unoccupied square within your cloud and you revert to your normal state inflicting double your KOM to all creatures within your cloud. This ability can activate The Cool Flow.

6th Circle - HivemindSu: You gain [Immunity] to effects with the [Mind-affecting], [Deafened], & [Blinded] descriptor and your world-mind spell can now be used to link to an ally at any distance.

7th Circle - Water CycleSu: Your Puddle markers last until the end of the [Encounter] and each Puddle marker gains a number of cycle points equal to your KOM.  Whenever you would take damage, you may have your Puddle markers take damage less than or equal to the amount of cycle points you have.  Your Puddle markers lose one cycle point for each damage dealt.

EDIT 1: Moved world-mind to 1st circle, slight clarity re-wording for the 2nd circle, revamped 3rd circle to what I had originally intended, added cold immunity to 4th circle, changed 5th circle to be based off of solid fog and clarified movement and actions, changed 7th circle to fit the theme.
« Last Edit: January 28, 2017, 12:07:56 AM by Mr. C4 »

Narsis

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Re: Sentient Razor Water
« Reply #1 on: April 17, 2016, 01:37:52 AM »
It's been a while since I've played a game of Legend so my system mastery isn't at its best but let's see...:

1st circle: Seems alright to me if perhaps a bit weak on it's own.

2nd circle: So kinda like cleave but with way less damage and single target.  Fire elemental gets better until level 15, but takes more circles to do it.  I'd need to actually try building a few characters with the track to see how I like it, but it doesn't strike me as unbalanced.  Although the way it's worded right now it could be interpreted as letting you build it up over multiple rounds and then unleash a super-nova of [Cold] damage, which would be a bad thing.

3rd circle: Would it trigger The Cool Flow on all creatures damaged?  Also, the "choose squares equal to level" thing strikes me as a bit odd.  At the earliest you get the ability I think you'd be level 6, and I doubt, unless you are fighting Myriads or something, that there would even be that many desirable targets in the AoE normally.

4th circle: Depends on usefulness of [Diving].  Also the tremorsense is maybe a bit boring, although that's not necessarily a bad thing.

5th circle: Is the only action you are able to take while in cloud form 5-ft steps?  If so it's really weak.  Like "I can't think of a situation ever where I'd want to use it" weak.  If it's rather the only movement you can make are 5-ft steps, it still strikes me as really weak, but I could at least see maybe some use out of it.  Definitely needs some work.

6th circle: Unless you are starting the game at a high level, your party is probably already going to have a source of world-mind or haven't been needing to use it thus far anyway so it's kinda moot.  The immunities seem perfectly at home here though.  Other sources of mind-affecting immunity come in around 5-7 circle, and the other immunities and world-mind probably make it worth a 6th circle spot.  You might want to consider moving the world-mind earlier, both to give the flavor of a hivemind earlier and because a person using the track would get some more mileage out of it.

7th circle: Pretty standard self-resurrection circle so no problems here although I'm not entirely sure how well it fits conceptually.


So overall it feels a bit weak to me mechanically.  It also feels kind of like a grab-bag of abilities rather than a unified concept.  I feel like I'd rather take Water Elemental or Mechanist Savant to get similar-ish flavor on something I could probably build off of better.
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MaesterofMadness

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Re: Sentient Razor Water
« Reply #2 on: April 28, 2016, 09:03:20 PM »
I've got some experience with Legend, and decided to stop lurking, so let me try my hand at examining it.

1st Circle: looks fine as is.

2nd Circle: 15th level seems far too late, and it's worded for Nova'ing. I'd give it the KOM bonus at 4th Circle myself, then the [Bleeding] at 6th, as well as put in that it doesn't stack with itself. If it's intended to stack, have it limited to half the circles you possess.

3rd Circle: Yeah, I'd drop the # of creatures restriction. It basically deals twice your KOM to all creatures inside, no save, and let's you teleport. Doesn't seem that bad to me. I'd word it like this;

3rd Circle - Crushing Wave: As a move action, you create a wedge with an area equal to half your movement speed, all enemies inside take [Cold] damage equal to your KOM, and this damage can be affected by The Cool Flow. Finally, you may move to any unoccupied square within the Wedge, which is a [Teleport] effect.

4th Circle: Looks fine, boring, like Narsis said, but fine.

5th Circle: I'd say you can only move a number of squares equal to your [Melee] Range per move action, but can freely act as per normal otherwise might bring up its power level a bit.

6th Circle: Agreed with Narsis, possible put the worldmind somewhere in the first three circles.

7th Circle: Agreed with Narsis, what if, when you returned, you always returned in your Piercing Veil form? That fits more conceptually with the rest of the track methinks.

Mr. C4

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Re: Sentient Razor Water
« Reply #3 on: November 19, 2016, 04:54:30 PM »
I updated the track to reflect what we've been using in game.  I just forgot to edit it here until now.

Daedroth

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Re: Sentient Razor Water
« Reply #4 on: November 20, 2016, 08:59:03 AM »
I updated the track to reflect what we've been using in game.  I just forgot to edit it here until now.


What [Swarm] means?